BOTC - US Lacrosse Community Forum Forums NORTHEAST LACROSSE BOTC MAIN FORUM (LI, CT, WC) Long Island Yellow Jackets Lacrosse

Spot on. People can do what they want with there own money and time. Some people spend time and money on a boat , camping etc. You do it for fun and memories. So please shut up about what we get out of it.

Many also learned how to sit on the bench and cheer on their teammates, you know the ones that actually play. They get to feel like they're part of something, and pay a nice fee for that.

...You're daughter was born and You became her Parents. Not LaxParents.
...you are just her mom and dad.
You signed her up for a sport(s) so that she would be part of a Team and learn and have a great experience.. she loves it or likes it and has played it. "It" ends. "It" is just part of who she is - and what you are supposed to be focused on - her
WHOLE future. Even if they play in college - It Ends.
We parents get far too obsessed with all of this. Re set your mind and energy. What are you doing with yourselves on this site at all hours, throwing out terrible comments, comparing, bragging..what the heck are you thinking? Ask yourself what you would be thinking about for your daughter, if there was no lacrosse? Then do that. The greatest players are those that guide themselves at this point. Back off and calm down.
If she is playing lacrosse for the wrong reasons that you guide her toward, ("it's going to get you a scholarship.." blah blah) she will naturally quit at some point, cause she doesn't love it....likely looonggg before You are ready. This is just normal. Get a grip. Be good parents who treat her as a teenage girl, not a product. If you're conversation begins and ends with Lax, it shouldn't. Guide her toward her ideal vocation, what is she good at, what does she think she may want to do?... and then a college that supports that passion for Her Life. Everything else is second to that.
Sports Ends. Quickly. Then, guess what, she is Your Daughter again. Not your lax girl. Focus People.

You should write a book Dr. Phil

He should because its accurate but it would be lost on you lax dad because I'm sure you don't read books he he

He he. Are you serious

Click? Really? Use spell check in the future and spend some of that 40K on SAT prep for your kid

Actually, spell check would not catch that professor. Be careful when you only come on here to criticize people.

I agree. It doesn't have to get so nasty folks.

BC single day Lax Clinic on Long Island October 14th, Kayla Treanor is now part of the staff which is a great pick-up for that program.

another YJ parent giving us all a bad name. And you wonder why.....

Take this to the SAT forums. Everybody on here's kid is getting a full ride.

If she goes to "a college she wouldn't otherwise be able to attend" - assuming you mean academically - you're just setting her up for failure. In over her head to start plus the "job" (time-wise) of lacrosse. Good luck.

I disagree with you saying that " you're setting her up for failure". Lacrosse is a great gateway to get into a college and I am not suggesting the girl has a 75 average and can get into an IVY League School however, they would be able to get into a college that they may not have been able to get into without being a student-athlete. I for one utilized my athletic ability to get into a better school that I know I would not have been accepted by admissions and ending up graduating with over a 3.5 GPA. - So I believe, that is what the previous parent was referring to

Agreed, there's a very finite amount of seats available at the top schools, when 30,000-40,000 kids (who may all be qualified) are applying for 2,000 seats anything that can help drag you across the finish line helps - lax would be one of those things

If your dream is to go to a Yale, Harvard, Stanford or pretty much any top end school, even the kids graduating #1 in their class have some difficulty getting in. If your kid was knocking at the doorstep of one of these schools, wonder how many people would pay someone off 10k to get them in the door. I know many people will throw millions of dollars at alumni funds to ensure their kids get in, and still many of them can't. Now a coach comes along and pulls your kids name out of a hat of 100 other kids just as deserving and walks them in the back door. That is an amazing opportunity opened for your kid. And she can quit the team and just become a regular student if the lax doesn't work out and she is way ahead. Everybody has a different angle on this topic, to each their own.

This applies to just a handful of kids. Again delusional parents for the most part. Talk about the bottom 97% of kids that's more realistic the talk about ivies and full rides is overpowering on here

Yes it only does apply to a small percentage of kids overall. But certain communities on LI send boys and girls every year to multiple Ivies and top academic schools because of lax. I'm not saying these kids wouldn't have had a chance of getting in otherwise, but it would've been much more difficult and without the guarantee. Don't discount it. It's a great way of getting your foot in the door especially if your Long Island HS or club have a history of sending lax players to those school.BfAWVZ

This applies to just a handful of kids. Again delusional parents for the most part. Talk about the bottom 97% of kids that's more realistic the talk about ivies and full rides is overpowering on here[/quote].

Just apply that principle to any school, doesn't need to be an Ivy. If lax give your kid an opportunity to get into "any school" that they normally would not have gotten into, that is great. Where most of the parents fail is choosing a school just because the coaches showed interest. I get it, many will have limited options, and I feel many , many make bad choices just to save face and be a part of college lacrosse. It may indeed be wiser to walk away from lax if it doesn't put your kid in an ideal situation education wise, but too many parents are too proud to let that happen.

This applies to just a handful of kids. Again delusional parents for the most part. Talk about the bottom 97% of kids that's more realistic the talk about ivies and full rides is overpowering on here[/quote]

I think lax helping you get into a better school applies to all the kids. Doesn't just mean Ivy. It means it can open up options that most kids without a talent in a sport (or other discipline) don't have. It might mean getting into a school like William and Mary or Colgate (GREAT SCHOOLS) when the next tier or two down academically was all that would have been possible. Or Bucknell, Lehigh, Lafayette or many others. It could also mean getting into a better D3 school academically than would have otherwise been possible. The ability to use lax to heelp get into a better school applies to many more than 3% of the club playing girls, particularly if they hit the books as well. And yes, for the most talented 3% that also are good students, places like the Ivies, Stanford, Duke Northwestern and a few other extremely difficult to get into schools become realistic, when for most even unreal students, they r not.

My final year of following the 2013 women lacrosse class and the playing time associated with the class.

As expected not much of a change from last year with 45% of 2013 commits playing significant time for their respective teams. 62% of commits remained on the roster for their teams with the additional players representing very limited minutes. The 45% falls just below the national average of 48% but the 62% falls above the national average of 53%.

It's been an exhausting enterprise to track but I believe very useful for those looking at schools for academics plus lacrosse. Half the girls looking t schools plus lacrosse will not be playing by their senior year. It is a useful reminder to set priorities.

I think lax helping you get into a better school applies to all the kids. Doesn't just mean Ivy. It means it can open up options that most kids without a talent in a sport (or other discipline) don't have. It might mean getting into a school like William and Mary or Colgate (GREAT SCHOOLS) when the next tier or two down academically was all that would have been possible. Or Bucknell, Lehigh, Lafayette or many others. It could also mean getting into a better D3 school academically than would have otherwise been possible. The ability to use lax to heelp get into a better school applies to many more than 3% of the club playing girls, particularly if they hit the books as well. And yes, for the most talented 3% that also are good students, places like the Ivies, Stanford, Duke Northwestern and a few other extremely difficult to get into schools become realistic, when for most even unreal students, they r not.
[/quote]

Depending on the program coaches can walk almost anyone through the door, especially on the boys side, but many girls as well. Plenty of NW players over the years who would have never had a prayer of getting in there that did because of lax

It's called the Preferential Pool. Anything that could be the tie breaker between you and someone else. That could be sports, art, music. It's not a bad thing. None of those will gain you entree into a school when your scores predict failure, so get over the "delusional parent setting a kid up for failure" line of reasoning. You still have to meet the school's entry requirements.

I think lax helping you get into a better school applies to all the kids. Doesn't just mean Ivy. It means it can open up options that most kids without a talent in a sport (or other discipline) don't have. It might mean getting into a school like William and Mary or Colgate (GREAT SCHOOLS) when the next tier or two down academically was all that would have been possible. Or Bucknell, Lehigh, Lafayette or many
others. It could also mean getting into a better D3 school academically than would have otherwise been possible. The ability to use lax to heelp get into a better school applies to many more than 3% of the club playing girls, particularly if they hit the books as well. And yes, for the most talented 3% that also are good students, places like the Ivies, Stanford, Duke Northwestern and a few other extremely difficult to get into schools become realistic, when for most even unreal students, they r not.
[/quote]

Also getting into some state schools from out of state are near impossible ,UVA, UNC, Michigan, William and Mary are a few that fall into that category . My son was near the top of his class w a 1400 on Sat and got flat out rejected or wait listed at 3 of those 4 .

I think lax helping you get into a better school applies to all the kids. Doesn't just mean Ivy. It means it can open up options that most kids without a talent in a sport (or other discipline) don't have. It might mean getting into a school like William and Mary or Colgate (GREAT SCHOOLS) when the next tier or two down academically was all that would have been possible. Or Bucknell, Lehigh, Lafayette or many others. It could also mean getting into a better D3 school academically than would have otherwise been possible. The ability to use lax to heelp get into a better school applies to many more than 3% of the club playing girls, particularly if they hit the books as well. And yes, for the most talented 3% that also are good students, places like the Ivies, Stanford, Duke Northwestern and a few other extremely difficult to get into schools become realistic, when for most even unreal students, they r not.
[/quote]

Exactly. Ivy League is not necessarily what every kid is looking for. Lacrosse can also help with making schools that are a great fit for a player more affordable, even if the student could get in without lacrosse. My daughter's GPA and test scores are high enough to get into an ivy league as an athlete. She was recruited by a couple of ivies, but what she would like to major in is not offered at ivies. Plus, even with qualifying for some financial aid, the cost would be more than we can afford. My daughter's best fit ended up being a public university - one she can likely get into without lacrosse. But, the lacrosse scholarship allows her to attend for less than we would pay at our in state public universities. Everyone's situation is different and players/parents need to focus on what works best for their family instead of worrying about what sounds most impressive to others. Just like with deciding between a spot at a top five school with no money and little chance of playing a lot, or picking the top 20 school with a scholarship and realistic chance of being starter. Some kids are good with just being on the team, and some parents are ok paying 50-60k a year for that, others are not. One size does not fit all.

Depending on the program coaches can walk almost anyone through the door, especially on the boys side, but many girls as well. Plenty of NW players over the years who would have never had a prayer of getting in there that did because of lax[/quote]

You think the the Duke or Stanford or Harvard kids r getting into those places without lax??? Almost all of them r not. It is true for all of those schools. Almost all of them would have "no prayer". But yes, Amonte-Hiller has put NU on the sports map and has helped the University as a whole in ways that maybe no other women's lax coach/team has. So yes, she probably does have more pull w admissions than some others. But u r not getting into Stanford or Princeton w 31 ACTs and 3.6 grade point averages as a normal applicant. And yet there are plenty of kids that got exactly that (and less) and r playing at those schools. In fact u usually need 35-36 ACTs and 4.0s in all AP classes to even have a chance to get into one of those schools as a "regular" applicant. Best Harvard player last year was a mediocre "B" student in high school. Ain't just NU, hate to tell you.

You think the the Duke or Stanford or Harvard kids r getting into those places without lax??? Almost all of them r not. It is true for all of those schools. Almost all of them would have "no prayer". But yes, Amonte-Hiller has put NU on the sports map and has helped the University as a whole in ways that maybe no other women's lax coach/team has. So yes, she probably does have more pull w admissions than some others. But u r not getting into Stanford or Princeton w 31 ACTs and 3.6 grade point averages as a normal applicant. And yet there are plenty of kids that got exactly that (and less) and r playing at those schools. In fact u usually need 35-36 ACTs and 4.0s in all AP classes to even have a chance to get into one of those schools as a "regular" applicant. Best Harvard player last year was a mediocre "B" student in high school. Ain't just NU, hate to tell you.
[/quote]

The post never said it was just NW, it's just that I know 3 players that were B students in HS and all found their way into the school. Again, much more prevalent on the boys side, but the girls are catching up, take advantage if the opportunity is there for you because of lax, hoops, football, etc.

There is so very little exceptional girls talent out there must be an agonizing task to see which kids a coach might want and try and walk in. Coaches are still having trouble getting enough talent for their rosters. Girls lax even with the reduced number of schools offering (but it adds more every year) there just aren't enough quality kids

Ok Mr. Talent Guru. Speak for your own daughter, who I'm sure is not exceptional.

The post never said it was just NW, it's just that I know 3 players that were B students in HS and all found their way into the school. Again, much more prevalent on the boys side, but the girls are catching up, take advantage if the opportunity is there for you because of lax, hoops, football, etc.
[/quote]


All of this talk about using lax to get into "better schools" amuses me. Once you graduate from college and start looking for a job no one cares where you went to college, unless (possibly) if you're a doctor. The only thing that matters is if you graduated, and if the school was an accredited institution. I've talked to quite a few knowledgeable people about this silly subject and all agreed that no one cares where you went.

LOL, yeah you keep telling yourself that.

There's no difference between Stanford, Northwestern, Vanderbilt, the Ivies -- in comparison to a SUNY, or a MAAC school, or current lax darlings like Florida, Maryland, Syracuse.

That's absolutely hilarious.

We get it, your daughter is headed to Delaware or Towson or Jacksonville.

Congrats and enjoy.

All of this talk about using lax to get into "better schools" amuses me. Once you graduate from college and start looking for a job no one cares where you went to college, unless (possibly) if you're a doctor. The only thing that matters is if you graduated, and if the school was an accredited institution. I've talked to quite a few knowledgeable people about this silly subject and all agreed that no one cares where you went. [/quote]

The network of people that your kid will have from certain institutions is something that will pay dividends for the rest of your life and quite probably increase opportunities for her offspring as well so I wouldn't discount the value of graduating from a top rated undergraduate program that most can't get into

The answer is that you are both right. The institution certainly does not define your success later
in life.

Here's what does: reading, writing, and communication skills, personality, hard work,
and most important of all, your resilience in the face of failure.

For certain professional paths, the social capital you have acquired is important too.

It not about the school- it's all about the values- if you value honesty, teamwork, hard work, and giving back, you are
well on your way to a solid future, regardless of where you went to college. And if you look at college outcomes, that's
not opinion, it's fact.

[quote=Anonymous]The answer is that you are both right. The institution certainly does not define your success later
in life.

Here's what does: reading, writing, and communication skills, personality, hard work,
and most important of all, your resilience in the face of failure.

For certain professional paths, the social capital you have acquired is important too.

It not about the school- it's all about the values- if you value honesty, teamwork, hard work, and giving back, you are
well on your way to a solid future, regardless of where you went to college. And if you look at college outcomes, that's
not opinion, it's fact.


The answer is that you are partly correct. For certain professions it absolutely matters where you go to school. Good luck getting a job in investment banking, or top consulting firms, as examples, without a degree from a top school. And that is not just social capital, it is a demonstration of many of the other attributes you mentioned. Same goes for your chances of getting into top graduate programs in many different disciplines. Now, having the skills and personal characteristics that you mention are the attributes of successful people. And many more of them end up at top schools. The networks are hugely valuable, fact, not opinion. By no means is going to a top school a guarantee of success in life, and by no means is not going to a top school a guarantee of a less than successful life. But in terms of optionality, going to a top school creates more.

Yes, agree with all of that- good post.

I would also add that many of these student athletes, once they get to college,
need to give more thought to how "success" is defined for them- that term means
very different things to people and requires a level of self-knowledge (wisdom?) that
is hard to come by.

Have you watched any mid level D1 women's lacrosse? A few really good players and the rest are all the same. Its a fact. And you are right my daughter is in the middle of the pack like 90% of the team

And there are 5 top FBS football teams and the rest are a toss-up as to who will win.......Whats your point????

did any of you check out that LI Elite 80 Camp... some awesome coaches guaranteed to be there and guaranteed to coach all girls. check it out http://igloolax.com/newsite/2017/02/28/li-elite-80-girls-camp-save-the-dates/

The boys last year was a waste of time. Its a money grab for IGL$$. Don't wast your time.

A waste of time and money. It's not selective. Coaches know the best talent will not be there.